September 1970: EDISON LIGHTHOUSE - "Love Grows (Where My Rosemary Goes)"

I figured this song was simply called “Rosemary”, and I also thought it very clever when singing it to the neighborhood babysitter Rosemarie. Now, several months previous to this there was a song by Flying Machine called “Smile A Little Smile For Me,” whose love object was named Rosemarie, but ‘cmon, I was 4 years old! My radar wasn’t yet that keen. Anyway, shortly thereafter, we moved from the inner-ring suburbs of Ferguson to the positively rural far reaches of North County, where I could no longer bother this poor girl.

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November 1973: HELEN REDDY - Leave Me Alone (Ruby Red Dress)

I had the biggest crush on a blonde hair, blue eyed boy in my 2nd grade class, Scott Van Seiver. Proximity is what made these feelings so u...